Thursday, October 12, 2017

First Post from London

I’m back!

Or so I’d like to say. I suddenly had the energy since I called off-sick from work and I was able to rest for a week, but I don’t know if I would be able to update this regularly from now on. I think it’s already six years since I last updated this blog; and honestly, I never intended to write on this again. But stumbling upon these pieces of microhistories made me sentimental and inspired me to write again. Although I can’t promise that I can write about quality stories, I know that I will surely share things that are true and close to my heart. (And aside from that, I also want to practice my English XD)

There had been many changes in my life during these past 6 years and I’d like to share these in different parts (along with several pictures, because we're living in a digital world now!):

~oOo~

CAREER

About a decade ago, I dreamt of London. Of its various historical sites, the intricacies of its buildings and the stories behind them. Of its people, their curious accent and polite way of dealing with people. Of its weather, its four seasons as compared with the Philippines' mere summer and rainy seasons.

Five months ago, my dream came true. For the better or for the worse - that I still have to find out.

I worked for five years under the pay medical-surgical ward of the Philippine General Hospital, and although I can’t say that I had already seen all that is there to see and absorb all the knowledge there is to gain underneath its roof, I decided to end my toxic relationship with it. I don’t want to complain because I know that compared to other nurses working in private hospitals, our salary is relatively higher and we also have additional compensation most of the time. I don’t want to prolong this post by enumerating various reasons that led to my decision, and I would like to reserve it for another post. The bottom line is, I felt tired, I quit, I moved on.

Hello from the other side.

~oOo~

FAMILY

Thankfully, I still have a whole, complete, and happy family. I’m happy that me and my brothers are not fighting with each other, and if we do, it’s only about who is the most ugly or who is probably adopted amongst us. I am very blessed to have such caring and supportive brothers and mother.

We were also able to visit mother’s province, Aklan, twice since I last wrote on this blog. The place is such a beauty and we were also able to go to Boracay. Although it’s more commercialized now than the last time we visited, the white sand, bright blue ocean, and the beach heat still took my breath away. Aside from that, we’re also able to spend time with our relatives there and they prepared for us a lot of seafood dishes, which are all oh-so-heavenly-good. I’m looking forward to visiting again and I hope the next time our family will be more complete.

 Seafood party with relatives.

Me and Boracay

Family picture at Boracay.

The only notable thing that had been a problem over the past years is my mother’s kidney stone. It bothered her a lot and there are times when we had to bring her to the hospital because of the pain. However, last February, she decided to undergo partial nephrectomy and we gave her our full support. It tested our patience with one another and in a sense, our family’s bond. All of us had a role in our mother’s medical journey - from diagnosis to recovery - and I am really glad that we made it through that trial. As of the moment, my mother said that she is recovering just fine and her flank pain is not bothering her anymore.

 Mommy before going to the operating room.

 The culprits.

Thank you National Kidney and Transplant Institute for the top-notch service!

And of course how could I forget, I already have my nephew from Kuya Arthur. He is such a darling! Although he can be naughty and bratty at times, he is still such a sweet, witty, and energetic child. He calls me confidently by my first name sometimes. Such a cutie! I hope that when I return to the Philippines, he can still remember me.

 Isn't he a stud? ^_^

It can't be more obvious that I'm in love with this child. 


~oOo~

LOVE LIFE

Teddy.

Last picture before I left him. :(

Well, what more do I have to say? We managed to endure eight years with each other. I am still happy with him and I hope that he still feels the same with me, too. We’re pretty much stable and comfortable with each other right now. We're hopeful that we can overcome this LDR thing.

~oOo~

EDUCATION

Fear.

If I can describe my view on education right now, that would be it. When I was in high school, I thought that I can pass and graduate with flying colors in any course that I would take. I was that confident with myself before. I loved studying and if I had a choice back then, I would like to be a student forever.

However, Nursing happened. I was very traumatized with how I studied back then. Fear of failure, lack of sleep, intense pressure, some terror professors, and fast-paced lessons are only some of the reasons why I hated college. I conquered it, graduated on time, and passed the board exams; however, the fear of learning is still there. I know that how my college did their thing worked because I am a safe and effective nurse right now, and probably all of the other nurses who graduated in the same college. However, the psychological toll on me is so great that I didn’t want to take another step into my university.

I tried applying for Master of Science in Health Informatics in the hopes that I could overcome my fear. I was able to accomplish the written requirements for the course but problems with schedule made me admit defeat. You see, if you are a regular staff nurse, you don’t have enough time for rest, family, friends - and what more for studies? It might have been possible if I was allowed to go on permanent night duty while I am studying but it wouldn’t have been possible with the tight staffing in our ward. So I decided to give up and explore my other options - hence, London.

At least I tried. Thanks for the good recommendation anyway Ma'am A. 

I still don’t know if my fear for education is justifiable or if my chosen path is right. But at least now, I think that the NHS is very supportive in terms of learning opportunities in terms of trainings and seminars. However, I still have to find out if I can realize my dream of accomplishing that MSHI.

~oOo~

I think those are the major updates in my life for now. There are some ups and downs but I consider myself lucky since I was able to reach where I am now. Even though it’s tough, I’ll make sure that every sweat, every muscle ache, every tear drop, will be all worth it for my future.

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